The Art of Not Giving a F*ck

Your Strategic Guide to What Actually Matters

Everyone tells you to care more.

Hustle harder. Be happier. Do better.

But here's the secret:
Trying to feel good all the time... makes you feel worse.

Sound weird, right?

Let me explain.

The Backwards Law

• The more you chase happiness, the more you feel like you're missing it.

• The more you chase success, the more you feel like a failure.

Why?

Because chasing something means you believe you don't already have it. That belief eats you alive.

But what if...

You stopped chasing? What if you picked just a few things to actually care about - and dropped the rest?

Not All F*cks Are Equal

Here's the truth most engineering career advice skips:
You have a limited amount of energy.

Every day, you get a few f*cks to give.

Use them on the wrong things - likes, clout, drama - and you burn out.

Use them on the right things - your values, your craft, your people - and your life changes.

The hard part? Choosing what matters.

Because saying "yes" to the right stuff means saying "no" to everything else.

Fail. A Lot.

Most engineers avoid failure.
They want to win. Be admired. Look smart. And I get it.

But growth lives in the dirt.

Fall flat on your face. Embarrass yourself. Get it wrong. That's where confidence is born - not in success, but in surviving failure.

Want a magic trick?

Do something. Anything. Action creates momentum.

You don't need motivation to start. You need to start to find motivation.

We're Not Special - and That's Beautiful

No one owes you success. You're not the chosen one. You're not the exception.
And me neither.

But here's the flip:
If you're not special... you're also not doomed.

You don't need permission to change.

You just need to decide what's worth the struggle.

Choose Your Pain

Everyone wants to be rich, happy, and loved.

But the real question is:
What pain are you willing to endure?

• The gym hurts. So does being out of shape.

• Work is hard. So is being broke.

• Love is tough. So is being alone.

You get to choose your pain. And in that choice... you build your life.

In the End

We're going to die.
That's not dark. That's our secret weapon.

Our projects will be forgotten. Our achievements will fade.
But how did we live?

That's the one thing that matters.

Don't optimize for other people's values.
Create the life that matters to you.

Your f*cks are your most valuable resource. Spend them where they actually matter.